Magic shop day6

Filled with shadows, was the eerie little alleyway. ‘No one ever came out alive’ was the legend that had been past through generation. Often the towns kids were dared by there friends to see far how they could go, but they were too scared to get very far. If one happened to venture all the way to the end of the alley, muggles wouldn’t see a thing; just a few dirty old dustbins, shadows dancing around them the smell of rotten trash in the air. Wizards and witches, on the other hand, would see a tiny little lolly shop with the sign ‘Laughing Lollies’ half hanging from the top of the wooden door.

A little shed was what it looked like, mint coloured paint peeled off the walls showing the dusty bricks underneath. It had no windows. The whole shop’s appearance changes as one steps inside. Its the size of a football pitch, marble floor stretched out metres. Covered it crazy swirly lampshades was the ceiling, higher as a fully grown pine tree. Every time the door swung open and the small bell let a soft ting as overpowering sent of sugar fills the air.

Sadie is the first thing one would see as burst inside glowing with anticipation. Sadie was the shop owner, she always has a great big smile stretched across her face, showing her patchy black and rotted down teeth. Wildly frizzy ringlets that reached her waist were such a vibrant shade of red they stood out in front all the lollies that lay awaiting behind her. A tall pointy hat sat built upright on the head, as she successfully greeted every customer the approached the store, with a cheerful  ‘hello’ or a ‘how do you do. 

Laughter fills everybody’s ears as they gaze upon with rows and row of different lollies; all different shapes, sizes and colours. Each type of lolly had their own individual magic twist. Broad smiles danced across customer’s faces as they explored and experimented the shelves of lollies. 

Over at the first row was a small girl in a fluffy white tutu, excitedly chewed at a pink eagle-shaped gummy that tasted like strawberries. She was uncontrollable giggling as she watched her big brother fly around the shop. A bright pink sign hung above the shelve that read, ‘GROW SOME EAGLE WINGS’.

Popping candy parrot, that’s shops most famous lolly creation. The moment this was eaten they feel a satisfying sizzle in their mouth. Once swallowed the person’s voice changes according to the last person to speak. So the next thing they say they will sound exactly like the friend that just talk to them. Many witches and wizards have found this lolly enchanting. 

Families happily left the shop with a paper bag in hand with the logo Laughing lollies print on the side. Chuffed with the purchases they made their way back down the gloomy ally, glancing over their shoulder to take one last look at the small shed. Wondering how something so magical could fit into something so unbelievably tiny. 

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Hi Tamara,

Read your work out loud. There are some word choices that do not fit with the context you are using them. Reading your work aloud will help you identify those times when your words do not match your intention.
Pay attention to your spelling and grammar. There are errors beginning to pop up in your writing.
Remember this is all about the specific detail you are writing about your shop. The more specific you can be the better.

Mr Johnson

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